Welcome to the Church of Thermal Ascension
Our church was formed on 30th November 2016 ( days ago). Our believers can fly.
Our Beliefs
- The Sun supplies all energy in our Universe thanks to the magical power of Fusion. (Fusion will be with us in t + 30 years.)
- We will be lifted aloft by the power of the Sun. (And cast down by the Darkness.)
- Our lives are a contest where the Sun triumphs over Gravity. (xcontest.org keeps the Holy records.)
- True enlightenment can only be found through Altitude. (Ridge Soaring does not count.)
- The Sun is immortal. (We define immortality as lasting less than 10 billion years.)
- If the sun makes you hot it therefore wants you to drink homemade beer in order to maintain an equilibrium (and avoid unnecessary taxes) it will use your sweat to make clouds for paragliding and more beer water.
- Whilst there is merit in all aviation, only the hike and fly pilot attains true communion with the universe.(Burn more calories, drink more beer, fly the smallest wing.)
Our Rules
- Defy gravity whenever possible. (Practice often missing the ground.)
- Use the power that the Sun bestows upon you. (In every way possible.)
- Help those less capable than yourself. (You were once less capable.)
- Avoid always the Cumulonimbus. (You are a puny human.)
- Repack your reserve often. (Don't assume your God will be in a good mood when you need him.)
- All soaring aircraft are equal. (Some are more equal than others.)
- Each day of the week is sacred. (No days are reserved for work.)
- No donations are accepted. No fees are charged by the church. (Give only to your local club.)
Contact
Email our High Priest highpriest@churchofthermalascension.orgYour prayers answered...
Church Services
- The holy words handed down on (misplaced) gold tablets.
All known wisdom can be found here. *(May not actually contain all known wisdom.)
- Flycast Worldwide PG Site Forecast APP
Install as an APP on any device. Get a weekly forcast for nearby flying sites.
- Paraglider Performance Calculator
Help the church maintain the holy records. Upload your track files and build a database of public data regarding real world wing performance figures.
- How to fly more and work less
Need help getting closer to the sun? You may find the answer here.
- Sell, Swap or give away!
Either too much junk or not enough junk? Need some help? Ask and you shall receive.
- Private Chat (Encrypted & Peer to Peer)
On the run from the FBI? Paranoid about being monitored? Secret stuff for you and your pals.
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Read about the lives of pilots who have dedicated their lives to the church. (Some without even knowing about it!)
- The game of thermal ascension.
When it is not possible to fly one must waste time. Here is a way.